bipolar disorder, Black Performers, Blogging, Business, Candid Talks, Gone Too Soon, Life, Mental Health, Personal, Random, Real Conversations, Stories, Sunday Night Thoughts, Working

Sunday Night Thoughts

It’s another Sunday night in the ATL, and for once this was a rain-free weekend. Like last week, I’m in my office, listening to slow jams and talking with people on Facebook.

I probably won’t make this a habit, but who knows. I’m kind of liking this idea of doing a weekly series called Sunday Night Thoughts. We’ll see how I feel come next Sunday.

Last week was some kind of week. For one, I realized that I was possibly experiencing hypomania because my meds just weren’t working; I was only getting a few hours even after taking them, and I went almost 48 hours without real sleep. But I did make another impromptu trip back home to Mississippi, almost completely unannounced. I did see some of the areas that were hit by the tornado that hit over two weeks ago. I’m glad that recovery is in progress, but I can still see how bad it was. But my hometown will recover.

Last week, I saw that my last article for bphope.com (click on the link to read it) really took off. Before I left for Mississippi on Tuesday, it had about 1,100 views and two comments. It exploded to over 3,000 views and 32 comments within 24 hours. Currently, it has almost 4,000 views and 35 comments. It’s one of my most popular posts, and it’s also somewhat polarizing. It wasn’t anything against me, but the topic in general.

I was also contacted by people who read my work and told me their own stories dealing with mental illness, whether it was about themselves, family members, or friends. One thing I wasn’t prepared for when I went on this journey was the outreach, but I feel good knowing that my work is helping people. I’m not the example of how to handle bipolar disorder, because I’m still trying to figure this thing out.

The hypomania…it was one hell of a trip. It ended this weekend when the meds finally started to work again. Luckily, I haven’t fallen through the cracks of depression, but I am tired from the massive energy burst of the episode that I think lasted over a week. Despite that, I was able to get some work done, and I spent the weekend going over stuff for my business over and over. I’m getting ready for what I hope to be a busy summer.

The strange thing about when I went home was that when I got up the next day to head back to Georgia, I had Prince stuck in my head. The second anniversary of his passing had just passed, and even though I wasn’t a crazed Prince fan, I really like his artistry. His death affected me in a way that I still have a hard time comprehending because it wasn’t that “Oh my God, my favorite celebrity is dead!”, but rather it was more of a reflection on my own life and where I am with my art and business, and where I would like to be…and what I haven’t done, but should’ve done. But for the rest of the day, all I listened to was Prince and Michael Jackson (Michael Jackson’s death affected me because he had some of the same drugs in his system that I used to take, and I have bad insomnia just like him, except his was apparently worse).

So as I conclude this session of my Sunday thoughts, I’m thinking about my future, business and personal. I’m looking at where I want to be, and I’m more determined to get there. So hopefully I will get some sleep tonight, and while I sleep I’ll continue to dream about what I want in life. When I wake up from that dream, it will be time to do what I need to do to make it happen.

See you later, my friends.

 

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